“Auschwitz is not only behind us.”

“Auschwitz must be comprehended in the context of its historical past, be recognized when it happens in the present, and not be ruled out blindly for the future.”

Gunter Grass  “A Father’s Difficulties in Explaining Auschwitz to His Children”

“My children have their doubts. They say: You don’t believe in anything anyway. I admit to my unbelieving life, and tell them: As soon as belief gets ahead of reason you can count on the demise of both politics and literature. Examples include the belief in one God, the belief in Germany, and the belief in true Socialism.”

Gunter Grass “Literature and Politics”

I have been reading a lot about the early part of the 20th century in Germany and the events and effects of what occurred then and there.

W. H. Sebald “The Emmegrants”, Ursula Hegi “Stones from the River”, Gunter Grass “The Tin Drum”, Roberto Belano “2666″, and a graphic novel “Berlin”, as well as many works by Kafka have been giving me some understanding of the enmeshing social and cultural atmosphere that produced the horror that was Auschwitz and the whole nightmare of the Holocaust and the insuing costs that left scars on the world.

Fear is the common thread that weaves this tapestry of doom. Fear disseminated by people who want to control the destiny of a nation and use it to hypnotize people and by degrees convince them to accept inhumanity as the only appropriate measure to protect their way of life.

Every time Dick Cheney or Rush Limbaugh or Glenn Beck speaks about what we should fear and why we must act on those fears. I am thankful that we have for the moment pushed them to side to focus on some of the pressing issues that face us as a nation. When they use the examples of Hitler and the Third Reich to paint the current political situation in blackest most fearful terms, they are actually using the methodology of the Nazi’s. I think we should fear unreasonable, unsubstantiated  fear and single minded devotion to blind faith in anything. Let’s think things through and look for evidence. Let’s keep our eyes and minds open to posibilities and continue to fill the air with our dreams for a world full of people who can discuss and celebrate differences without the shadow of unreasonable fear. Then Auswitz will be behind us, as well as Rawanda, and Vietnam, and Iraq, and Afghanistan and torture for freedom’s sake.

We do have a long way to go before we are far enough ahead of this thing that it can’t creep up and bite us in the ass again. Maybe we need better rearview mirrors, or maybe take turns looking out, but we have to know what the thing looks like in order to avoid it. When we are looking for a high-stepping, swastika resplendant mob it might sneak up on us in the form of some nice people concerned about morals, or anti-terrorist legislation to keep us safe. Your favorite relatives and best friends could be involved. That is how it gets in when we are afraid to disagree with nice people about their bad ideas and unreasonable fears. Fear is the monster that closes the mind to humanity: careful listening, respectful conversation, and diligent open-minded inquiry are the weapons that will slay it. These are the things that keep us  from reliving the horror of Auschwitz.

A New Calender To Fill Up

This is the cover from my calender from July 08 through July 09. This year was a mix of many ideas and moods a lot of them frustrating and disappointing. I am now just one month into a new calender, and have yet to put a blank sheet on it for doodling (no long boring meetings). Already it has been eventful. I have quit my old job and as a result I got to finish my August with circus camp, which was totally inspirational. I got to meet a one armed juggler and family counselor who juggles bowling balls, and I get a few days off before I start my new job this week. A job that I hope will give me a lot more inspiration and joy. last year had some dark and desperate times almost all of them job related. I am hoping that the change I am making will make a huge difference in my creative life. It is already having a good effect on my outlook. Thursday is my first teacher in-service and potluck meeting with parents. For once I am not dreading paperwork days and multiple days of meetings in which I have to listen to the word from on high and not so high. I am in charge of the preschool, but I aim to invite children and parents into a learning collaboration. I think in this new coop school setting it will be possible. I know this year will be full of challenges and adjustment, but I am really looking forward to working with children and families and not having to prove that I am doing something by entering data and checking boxes. My documentation this year will be photographs and works of art, language samples and videos. The challenges will be how to cram it all into a tiny classroom and the time that I know will seem to short for all the ideas we want to explore.

101 in 1001

Self-Experiment #?

I have been inspired by fellow blogger  Three World Chant to create a list of 101 things I will accomplish in 1001 days. I have posted the list on a separate page here. I have been so inspired I started immediately working on the list before it was even finished.

Yesterday I walked a mile and a half at a place I had never been before and took 16 pictures some of which are below. I also got my bike out and started fixing it up and today I got a helmet. I put my car on Craigslist and wrote in my journal. I am still diligently reading 2666 by Robert Bolano which is so intreaguing in a very wierd way, but, also, so very long. I am half way through it. I hope I can finish before it is due at the library. I have another week off to tackle other things on the list. I worked on my novel for 5 hours the other day and will do more tonight. I am off now to clean out my moldy car so I can have people look at it on Sunday. So much time and so little to do. Wait strike that. Reverse it. Pictures from the sculpture garden tucked away in the middle of  a foresty part of a park in the middle of a nice little neighborhood in the middle of our charming little city.

The Lost World of Fiction

I have not been able to find that mystical space where I find stories. It is lost in the fog of long hours of work and no silence, of dreams interrupted by my alarm at 6:00 in the morning. It is hidden by days busy with small chores and many very important jobs and lists of actions undone for lack of time. I need to tell myself some stories and write them down, even if they do not translate well into other peoples ideas of readable fiction. First it has to be for me and then I can fit it into a form that others can use.  I have to find the space in time that allows me to create worlds in my head that I can put characters in and watch them move and interact. I will listen to their tales and passions and watch their faces and think thoughts that are theirs and mine. It’s only a little bit crazy, but it keeps me sane to use my mind in this way.

Beginning the Journey Again

I wrote a comment on a list to a student who was wondering if the Reggio Emilia child centered approach to preschool was they way to go for a teacher just starting out. After I wrote I realized it really was a pep talk for myself.

I love teaching 3 to 5 year olds, but I am often left frustrated and de-inspired by the program I work for and my supervisor, who has a philosophy that you must keep children in line and under control. And then there is the never ending paperwork that has nothing to do with teaching or learning. I am nearing the end of another year in this program and I realize that I have been guilty of giving up the soul of my teaching out of laziness and frustration instead of putting into practice my philosophy where I can squeeze it in. It is so easy to fall into the I can get through this attitude when faced with the ever present status quo thinking, but the bottom line is I have not done enough to create the learning community I want my classroom to be. If I am not committed to the ideas that inspire me then how can I convince others to step onto the path. If I start now I will be ready for tomorrow and that will launch me into the next day. Little steps, carefully taken on the path to my goal of a classroom of engaged learning, I can do this if  I seize my opportunities and inspire others. If start with a little dreaming today, I can go into tomorrows planning session with some fire to light the first steps to finish off the year with some enthusiasm.

Here is my pep talk:

1. If you are working in large program or with a team, what are the approaches they use now and can the Reggio approach be used within the existing structure? How much do your team members know about this approach and are you ready to inspire change? It is challenging to be the only teacher in a program using this model.

2. Have you done the work of exploring your ideas about children and how they learn? On what inspires you and how you form relationships with children, parents and other teachers? If you are ready and committed to the philosophy then even if you stumble around a little, you will know that it is all part of the process of becoming an authentic teacher, but you have to know how you fit into the process first.

You have to know that whatever you do will look different than anything else if you are doing it right. This approach is about building a community of learners: Teachers, students, parents, siblings other members of the enveloping community. Your learning community will be a collaboration of all its members and so unique. If you are ready for being open to whatever happens and to building relationships based on respect and creativity then you are ready to start. The main thing is to reflect on the journey as you take the steps and not be too impatient. Have big ideas as you take the little steps along the way.